aishahschwartz: This weekend was an up and down emotional roller-coaster...When I got home tonight I put my things away and made wudu and went to pray Isha...and I cried begging Allah (swt) to help me remember the good things...the positive and uplifting parts of my experience in Mecca.  Al-hamdulillah that Allah (swt) didn't disappoint me and there are such wonderful things to tell you...

aishahschwartz:  One of the neatest things happened...

aishahschwartz:  subhan'Allah...

aishahschwartz:  Allah (swt) made sure I got there (to Mecca) because He intended for me to be there...

ann_spaulding_usn:  yes He did intent for you to be there, and to study and to get a blessing. inshallah!!!

aishahschwartz:  Part of the whole Umrah experience is the Tawaf (or the encirculing - 7 times) of the qib'lah

ann_spaulding_usn:  yes I know that part.  It's so beautiful what I have read so far for hajj.

aishahschwartz:  and at the beginning corner it is covered with a gold plate about "people" height...lol...and if you can't get to it to kiss or touch this spot...you can "wave"...and there were a lot of people...as could be expected at most any time...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I know.  Do some people just touch the other people if they can't get close enough? or what?

aishahschwartz:  there were a lot of people there that day...

aishahschwartz:  funny you should say that...

aishahschwartz:  that's part of the story I'm about to tell you...

ann_spaulding_usn:  wow, cool!!

aishahschwartz:  masha'Allah...

aishahschwartz:  Anyway...

aishahschwartz:  again...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I can't wait to see your story for the group.  I'm sure it will be truly amazing and awesome and most inspiring!!

aishahschwartz:  considering that this was my VERY FIRST

ann_spaulding_usn:  alhamdilillah

aishahschwartz:  Umrah...

aishahschwartz:  I really and truly wanted it to be the maximum experience...

aishahschwartz:  so, as we were making the 7th passing

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm sure you did receive the best.  Allah knows your intention and your heart!!!

aishahschwartz:  I told Mustafa that I wanted to reach the corner...

ann_spaulding_usn: did you?

aishahschwartz:  he was hesitant (gee...the scene did appear somewhat barbaric...)

aishahschwartz:  and at first he tried to stop me...

aishahschwartz:  but I insisted I wanted to do it

ann_spaulding_usn:  good for you!!  I'm so proud of you!!!

aishahschwartz:  the number of other people also attempting this goal was staggering...

aishahschwartz:  it was really something...

aishahschwartz:  everyone was just sandwiched like sardines into a wave of movement taking us forward, ever so close...

aishahschwartz:  and then pulling us back again...

aishahschwartz:  you know...two steps forward

aishahschwartz:  three steps back

aishahschwartz: 

aishahschwartz:  Suddenly I noticed to my right

aishahschwartz:  A teeny-tiny little old woman...

ann_spaulding_usn:  wow

aishahschwartz:  with her right arm out-stretched...

aishahschwartz:  trying desparately to reach the stone...

aishahschwartz:  masha'Allah...

ann_spaulding_usn:  did you help her and then help yourself?  wow

aishahschwartz:  I felt like she would drown in the waves...

ann_spaulding_usn:  awesome of her!!!

aishahschwartz:  and somehow...

aishahschwartz:  there I was...

aishahschwartz:  behind her...

ann_spaulding_usn:  you are giving me shivers sister.  I love ya!! and I'm happy you helped her so much!!!

aishahschwartz:  supporting her with my right arm up behind her back and underneath her right arm...

aishahschwartz:  and her left arm was outstretched and holding on so tight to my left hand...

ann_spaulding_usn: 

aishahschwartz:  and every time the wave pushed us back...

aishahschwartz:  with all the strength I could muster...

aishahschwartz:  I pushed right back (lol) and lifted her up and forward...

ann_spaulding_usn:  alhamdilillah!!!

aishahschwartz:  trying to get her to the gold covered corner...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I am sitting here with the biggest grin on my face, I can see it!!  wow!

aishahschwartz:  the sun was beaming down do hotly...

aishahschwartz:  and people were sweating...

aishahschwartz:  and there was a guard literally having to shove and even slap some of the men on the head (astaghferullah)...

aishahschwartz:  to get them away so other people

aishahschwartz:  could get there, too...

aishahschwartz:  and suddenly...

aishahschwartz:  I swear...

aishahschwartz:  my sweet little old woman...

aishahschwartz:  reached her destination...

aishahschwartz:  and her face was just beaming...

aishahschwartz:  and she was smiling...(she looked just like a baby...masha'Allah...)

ann_spaulding_usn:  wowwwww awesomeeeeeeeee

aishahschwartz:  and her eyes were shining so brightly...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm so happy for her and you!!!!!!

aishahschwartz:  and she was speaking to me in a language I could not understand...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm sure it seemed an impossible task but your heart and her's was pure so you did it!!!

aishahschwartz:  but I know she was thanking me...

aishahschwartz:  and making dua for me...

aishahschwartz:  and you know...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I am about to cry, honestly.  This is beautiful!!!

aishahschwartz:  even though I didn't make it to the corner myself...

aishahschwartz:  I felt like I had made it...

ann_spaulding_usn:  you were touching her??

aishahschwartz:  just from holding on to her...

aishahschwartz:

ann_spaulding_usn:  wowwwwww

aishahschwartz:  It was so awesome...

aishahschwartz:  Afterwards, I guided her out of the throng of people...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm sure.  I'm sure that was one of the parts you will never forget.

aishahschwartz:  to where it seemed there were some other members of her party standing and watching....

aishahschwartz:  there were a couple of other sisters standing there...

aishahschwartz:  and I think the male figure was her son...

aishahschwartz:  he was thanking me...

aishahschwartz:  masha'Allah...

ann_spaulding_usn:  wowwwww

ann_spaulding_usn:  awesome!!!!!

aishahschwartz:  and before I turned away, I hugged the little old woman tight, and planted a kiss on her forehead...well...two actually...

aishahschwartz:  and turned to re-join my husband.

ann_spaulding_usn:  yes mashallah!!!  He definately willed this to happen and used you!!! Allah Akbar!!!!

aishahschwartz:  Sakinah...

aishahschwartz:  it was such an overwhelming feeling...

aishahschwartz:  when you finish from there another part of the process is to pray two rakat...

aishahschwartz:  and there I was...

aishahschwartz:  in front of the Qib'lah...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm sure. I get shivers just hearing of it, and I know your heart is so good and you try so hard.  I'm so happy this happened to you!!!

aishahschwartz:  in Mecca...

aishahschwartz:  praying...

aishahschwartz:  and the tears were just running from my eyes...

aishahschwartz:  and I just felt like I didn't want to move from the spot where I was praying...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm sure it was a heart cleansing experience. truly!!!

ann_spaulding_usn:  you needed this so much!!

aishahschwartz:  even though the sun was just burning down on us...

aishahschwartz:  But you know what, Sakinah?

ann_spaulding_usn:  I want to go there!

aishahschwartz:  That wasn't the first experience I had like that...

ann_spaulding_usn:  what??

ann_spaulding_usn:  there?

aishahschwartz:  wallah...you won't believe this...

ann_spaulding_usn:  I'm sure!!!

aishahschwartz:  When we were first arriving, the adhan was calling us to Asr, remember?

aishahschwartz:  Well...

aishahschwartz:  They had just begun the salat...

ann_spaulding_usn:  yes, oh wow.  what else happened.  I am so happy to hear all this!!

aishahschwartz:  so the prayer area was pretty full in the area of the gate we entered.

aishahschwartz:  I turned to walk down the back row to my right where other sisters had gathered...

aishahschwartz:  and finding it spilling off the carpet and onto the tiles...

aishahschwartz:  I was a little disappointed...(just because I wanted to be closer...)

aishahschwartz:  then I peeked around the corner of the retaining wall...

ann_spaulding_usn:  just enough room I'm sure lol

aishahschwartz:  and second row from the back...

aishahschwartz:  I saw what looked like a space...

ann_spaulding_usn:  a space was all you needed.

aishahschwartz:  even though there appeared to be a scarf laying there...

aishahschwartz:  I decided to scootch in anyway...

aishahschwartz:  I stepped into the rakat that had already started...

aishahschwartz:  and then when we were moving back into a standing position from prostration...

aishahschwartz:  I noticed that the little old 4-toed woman sitting beside me could hardly manage getting herself back to her feet...

aishahschwartz:  and I just instinictively tucked my arm up underneath her elbow...

aishahschwartz:  and lifted her up...

aishahschwartz:  and when we began the second rakat...

ann_spaulding_usn:  wow, I am so happy you did that!!!

aishahschwartz:  I noticed that leaning up against the pillar directly to my right...

aishahschwartz:  was a folded-up wheelchair...

aishahschwartz:  obviously it was hers...

aishahschwartz:  so...

aishahschwartz:  for each of the next three rakat...

ann_spaulding_usn:  she was trying her best to pray. Alhamdilillah. may she be rewarded 100 times more !!!!

aishahschwartz:  I helped her back up...

aishahschwartz:  and at the end...

aishahschwartz:  she said, simply, and quietly, "Shukran."  (Al-hamdulillah, I do know that means, "Thank-you!" 

ann_spaulding_usn: 

aishahschwartz:  and smiled...

ann_spaulding_usn:  a smile is the best charity I think!!!!

aishahschwartz:  And you know what?

ann_spaulding_usn:  mmm?

aishahschwartz:  before I began to rise from that first prostration in the first rakat...before I knew she might need assistance...

aishahschwartz:  when I was making dua with my face to the floor...

aishahschwartz:  I was already so overtaken by just being there...that, here, too...

aishahschwartz:  I found tears just streaming down my face...and my fingers trembling...

aishahschwartz:  subhan'Allah...

ann_spaulding_usn:  each tear is much cleansing of the soul!!!

ann_spaulding_usn:  ahamdilillah!!!

aishahschwartz:  Whew...

aishahschwartz:  What an afternoon...

aishahschwartz:  I so want to go back again...

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Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatuallahi wa Barakatuh.

Dear Shabana...

I remember sitting in your apartment and ever so eagerly listening to you tell me about your trip for Hajj...and I so vividly remember you telling me how you felt to never leave...subhan'Allah...now I truly understand.  I love you for the sake of Allah (swt).  You are in my heart and duas.  I hope that son of yours is keeping you busy! 

Wa'Salaam Alaikum.

~A.

FEEDBACK:

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Assalamu Alaikum

Dear Aisha,

Gosh...sob...sob...YOUR email made ME cry all over again! Subhan'Allah! I am so happy that you are with us here on the board...wallah...I feel so strongly that each person that is a member of this sisterhood is here for a reason that, even though some may be consciously aware of it...others not feel sure just exactly why they are here...or maybe even why they stay...but Allah (swt) knows. We are all human beings...subhan'Allah...and we all have so much to share...and one of the things I think we might take from what happened to me in Mecca...is that...there are so many ways in any given day whereupon we find ourselves in a situation opening a window of opportunity to fulfill our duty as Muslims to perform good deeds...only, sadly, I think so many of these opportunities are missed...because we just "don't have time" or just "don't want to get involved" or the "telephone just rang" or we're "just too tired"...I am sure adding to the list of excuses is easy enough...but sisters...I just want for each of you to experience the blessings Allah (swt) has for you...and to reap the rewards for even the slightest of deed that would make Him happy...I picture Allah (swt) sometimes, sitting and waiting for us...waiting for us to see that He really wants the best for us...all we have to do is look over our shoulders...sometimes to the right...sometimes to the left...all we have to do is look...and then assume responsibility for what we see...instead of ignoring it and busying ourselves with our "own" lives...Our lives are not our own...they are a loan to us from Allah (swt)...with each new day that He gives us...comes a new day filled with opportunity...lets start each day anxious to review the day's entry for deeds documented in the books kept by the angels on our behalf...insha'Allah, it is my dua that each of you will find plenty of good reading therein.

Wa'Salaam Alaikum

~Aishah

Next story...insha'Allah...my first experience wearing niqab...(yes, you read that correctly...)...wow...how very, very interesting indeed...subhan'Allah.  ~A.